Date: Fri, 31 Jul 2020 13:00:40 -0700 From: Kyle Weaver Subject: Crush My Bubble – Part 30 Part XXX — Make the Yuletide Verse Gay I started to live with gaps in my memories. No. That’s not quite right. It’s more like gaps in my identities. I once had this self-image of myself as this cohesive composite–this complete thing that understands himself in his totality. But that wasn’t exactly it. There were facets of me that didn’t communicate completely. I think everyone kind of knows that, and everyone kind of doesn’t. The part of me most capable of taking over operations and making a halfway sensible narrative of what I do–Tyrant–Godric cut that part off from my time with him. So when I was with Godric, the experiences got stored in a part of my mind isolated from Tyrant. Tyrant damned large swathes of me to the back of my mind. That’s what is needed, in order to respond to influences pulling in different directions–and do what I have to do. So when Godric caged Tyrant–parts of me were set free. For a long time, Godric helped Tyrant keep my lust at bay. But with Tyrant falling apart at the seams, Godric had no choice but to back another horse. Tyrant protected my pride, and in doing so, he suppressed my humiliation. Godric, on the other hand, embraced my humiliation. He made my humiliation feel good. Much of who I am has craved to be Godric’s bitch forever. Godric was finally willing to explore these parts of me. And I was going to explore every inch of him. — As I reached my room, a haze fell over my eyes, and I chuckled, trying to walk straight. It was odd. I hadn’t been drinking–had I? I stopped at the door, reaching for my neck, grasping the pride necklace, and lifting it up past my head. The moment I did, all the stress in the world seemed to vanish. I draped the necklace over the doorhandle–then turned the knob. Godric was splayed out on his bed. His indigo jockstrap had become a mainstay. If he was alone in the room, or it was just the two of us, he would be wearing it, and only it. I closed the door behind me, walking over to Godric slowly, pausing just as I reached the foot of the bed. I wanted to get in with him, but it was like an invisible wall had materialized, and I couldn’t walk through. “Forgetting something?” Godric asked. “Godric–sir,” I said. “Can I get into bed with you?” “Not yet,” Godric said, turning the page of his book. I stood there, silently staring at the man of my dreams. What a sight to behold. His hazel eyes, focused on his book. His strong arms that seemed to beckon me, his pectorals that were my favorite pillow, his abdominals that splintered the light and shadows. His filled-out indigo jockstrap. His diamond quadriceps branching out on each side, drawing my eyes to their convergence like a road to the horizon. The light glinting off the bridge of his smooth feet. My mouth watered. What had he said? “It’s Study Week,” Godric said, turning the page of his book. “Do you know what that means?” I nodded. It meant a week of no classes, no games, and no practice. “It means Finals are coming,” I said. “And we are supposed to study hard.” “That’s right,” Godric said. “And I have a plan in mind. You WILL spend each day studying for your classes. You WILL do well on your exams. But what is life without a bit of winding down each night. So I’ve decided–each night, you get to study a bit of me. One piece of me, each day, when you are done with your day’s work. So every day this week, from now on, when you get back to the room, you are going to strip down to your underwear and let go of the outside world. No more climbing into bed like everything is normal, only to clamp your ass and face around my cock at every possible turn. You are going to show me more.” I stripped down. I reached out, tracing Godric’s foot with one hand. He didn’t spare me a glance. I brought my other hand over and started to rub circles into the lateral arch. Godric whiled away the minutes, the only noise the occasional crinkle of paper against paper as Godric turned another page. Eventually, Godric reached a spot in his book that made him chuckle, wiggling his toes. I gasped, letting go, my eyes trained to those little dancers. I sunk down to my knees, bringing my face close to them, until his toes stopped moving like they’d been spooked. Then, I took a deep, audible breath. Godric pushed his foot into my face. I closed my eyes, sniffing and nuzzling into it. He dragged his feet across my cheeks and lips, one after the other. “I love how you fuck my mind,” I whispered, my lip catching the skin of his foot. “I know you do, Jayden.” Godric swung the marble and chain in front of my eyes, and they drooped over. He didn’t even have to mention Blackberry Creek anymore. He’d broken me. I mean honestly, how much control did Tyrant have over the situation anyway at this point? Without Pride, Tyrant was powerless. Pride was the only thing that kept me off Godric’s jock. And that had just been a big silly mistake, hadn’t it? How much more control could Godric take from me. Why even bother with the marble–anymore? I dragged my lips over the bottom of his foot, breathing it in with an open mouth. Over and over I brushed my lips against him, making him twitch and growl. I was already his sex slave. But I knew what he wanted. I lolled my tongue out and lapped the bottom of his foot from heel to toe. He wanted to lock in place this mental configuration, so I didn’t get antsy. If he didn’t, I would want to find a way to get his cock inside me within the hour. He wanted to drag this out… I closed my lips around his toes, one after another, giving each dancer a warm bath, slurping everything clean. He wanted his faggot to enter a dreamlike devotion, worshipping his feet in unconscious bliss for hours on end. Godric would get exactly what he wanted. What must that be like? — Holes gaped in my awareness, just like they did in my body… It was like there were two versions of myself. The outside self, the one that wore pride, the one governed by Tyrant. And the inside self, the one that took glee in Tyrant’s downfall. They hardly communicated with one another. Why would they. They were enemies. To another observer, I might appear mad. But ask any version of me and I’ll tell you: I’m just as sane as anyone else. There may be more mes than there are yous. But none of them are crazy. Godric understood. I’d leave my pride on the doorknob, and he would keep Tyrant awake, just long enough to understand… Tyrant was being overthrown in the most humiliating, emasculating way… My body betrayed the ruling segment of my own mind–until it fell from power–and all that remained–was all the suppressed trash. Godric made small talk. He let my nerves run. He toyed. Eventually, he let me crawl into bed. “I left my pride on the doorknob again, Godric,” I whispered. “I know.” “That means I can be your faggot.” “Is that what you’ve always wanted?” I kissed up his ankle and leg, making my way along the trail of fuzz toward his bulging jock. I stopped, inches away, burying my face between his quadriceps. “Not going any further?” Godric asked. “No,” I murmured, my voice muffled by his hot skin, my lips sticking to his sweat. “See, Jayden. You are showing control already. As long as I tell you exactly what to do, you can do anything.” I nodded into his legs, nuzzling between them. Godric split his legs out a bit, letting my head sink. Then he tightened his warm, smooth, thick quadriceps–I got a glimpse of a single vein darkening–as he clamped his muscles around my head. He chuckled as my vision went black. “You like it in there?” he asked. “Yeah,” I whispered. Of course, to him it would just sound like a low gasp. I swiveled my head, his sweaty brawn coating me from all angles. Then, I plastered my lips against the lithe leg muscle–and sucked. “Just like that, Jayden,” Godric said. “Just like that. Let your mind fade…” — After the third day of studying, Godric looked a bit different, splayed out on the bed–as though someone with lipstick had kissed his legs, trying to get a tag in Fagball. No–not lipstick. Hickies. He had a big red hickey on each quad, where I had sucked each leg for at least an hour, my mind going numb. “May I?” I asked at the edge of the bed. Godric nodded, not turning away from his book. I crawled between his legs, making my way up the road they shaped, towards the indigo bulge on the horizon. I pressed my lips against one of the red marks. “Does it hurt, sir?” “Nah,” Godric said.”But leave it alone. Different body part each day, remember?” I caught his eyes for a second, shimmying slightly further forward. Then, I planted my face in his jock, nuzzling against the bulge. “Weren’t you listening, bitch. NEVER.” With one hand, I gripped his jockstrap fabric, pulling it slightly away from his body, making a little gap. With my other hand, I dug for treasure, easily finding his balls (they took up much of the space) and softly pulling them towards me. They wouldn’t come easily–the gap wasn’t so big–but I kept at it and they came out, one after the other, popping back to life after squeezing through the stretched gap. They just kept sliding too–they weren’t small, and the sack hung low. My hand greased over with ball sweat and I brought it to my nose, my eyes rolling, as Godric’s balls swung free. I leaned forward–and dragged my tongue over Godric’s bulbous left nut. Godric growled. “You know I’m not going to let you suck my cock, Jayden.” “It’s not your cock, Godric,” I croaked. “It’s your balls. Different body part.” “How long do you expect me to keep letting you get away with that?” Godric asked, cocking an eyebrow. “Given that you always go for my cock a minute later. It’s clearly a gateway drug for you.” Keeping his gaze, I closed my lips around his nut, rolled my tongue around, and siphoned ball sweat straight from the source. Godric clawed my hair. His breathing grew labored, like an animal; his pectorals jut out; his eyes flashed then twinkled, and he bit his tongue. I opened wider, my jaw clicking, and wrapped my lips around both balls at once. I peered straight into Godric’s eyes–and sucked. “This is really what you wanted, all these years?” Godric asked, flexing as he breathed. I nodded–my eyes widening as I gazed upon my idol–and gulped his ball sweat down. Godric’s abdominals swamped my face, tightening as he leaned in. I could feel what the fuss was about. He had no chance of hiding it. His cock had expanded to half-mast. The jockstrap could barely contain it. The cockhead stretched the fabric in a little bulb, and he was leaking through it. I nudged my face against it as I tongued his balls. He was right. Something about sucking his balls made me want to suck his cock more. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Maybe if I pleasured his body just right–he’d relax this whole no-sucking-cock thing. He couldn’t sustain an outrageous rule like that, right? I swiveled my head around, trying to worship his balls from every possible angle. Eventually my head was sideways. Godric cupped the back of it. Maybe he was thinking of finally jamming my face where it belonged? As Godric’s cock got bigger and harder, it stretched his jockstrap away from his body. The gap I’d ushered his balls from expanded just enough for me to make out the trunk Godric’s mammoth tree. I slid my tongue past Godric’s balls–sweeping under them–and prodded the barely visible base of Godric’s perfect shaft. Retribution came swiftly. Godric backhanded my face with a crisp slap. Then, he leaned back a bit, dangling the marble and chain in front of my eyes. I shook my head. “You need to learn, gay boy,” Godric said. “You are lucky I’m not kicking you out of the room.” I wanted to make a few more memories before he stripped my consciousness from me. I whimpered, lapping at Godric’s balls, slowly tracing the line between them. “Look to Blackberry Creek, Jayden.” I paused. “Part of me–wants to remember.” “Blackberry Creek, FAGGOT. LOOK INSIDE.” “I see it, Godric,” I whispered. “It’s calm today. The snow is gone.” “I know. I made it that way. Now–take the leap. Plunge into it.” — The next day, as I draped my pride on the doorknob, I knew where I would be headed today. I had thought I’d keep moving up his body, piece by piece, going slow enough to not use up his whole body before the week ended–in order to keep my promise. But now… I figured I would go a bit slower than I’d originally thought. NO, Tyrant fumed. I SAID NEVER AGAIN. IT WAS SO DEMEANING, SO GROSS… I salivated as a dumb expression spread across my face. Sure, it boiled Tyrant. But the rest of the trash would be so happy–wouldn’t it? When Godric let me into bed, I crawled up along his leg, pausing, pressing my face into his jock, breathing slowly. “Alright, gay boi,” he said, smirking. “You’ve exhausted everything below the waist.” “Not everything,” I said. “My cock is still off limits.” I nuzzle my face between his quads. “And you tried those the day before.” I kept pushing. “You know,” Godric said. “I’m getting an inkling where you may be headed.” “Does it turn you on?” I asked, turning my face up for a moment, still framed between his strong legs. “Dominating your best friend completely? Turning me into your slave?” “I’m not sure yet,” he said, cocking his eyebrows, stroking my hair. “Really?” I said. “It makes me so happy Godric, getting to be the first person to do this for you.” “Who says you are the first?” Godric’s hazel eyes bore into mine. “But I thought,” I said, “that you only ever did stuff with Winter…” “What’s your point?” “Hell,” I whispered softly. It shouldn’t have affected me. But somehow it did, knowing he had this kind of kink, this kind of dominance, in the past, even with a girl. It just was just his nature. I guess that’s where the leather jockstrap came from. I twisted between Godric’s legs until I was on my back, shoveling my head under him. I pressed my head against his jock-clad balls, pushing his thighs a little bit into the air. I wiggled into place, pinned by my idol, Godric’s ass cheeks resting on my face. “What the fuck?” Godric said, his ass flexing with the rest of him. “You serious?” I held one ass cheek with each hand, rubbing my face back and forth. “FUCKIN’ BITCH.” I pushed my tongue out and prodded his hole. “FUCK!” Godric croaked, a bit higher pitched than usual. “Fuckkk… Just when I thought I’d seen it all…I mean…Winter never crawled under my ass like THAT. Are you for real?” I dragged my tongue slowly along his crack. “You really are a fag for me–aren’t you?” I pressed my mouth against his hole and smacked my lips. “Well–I might as well ride the wave.” I dragged my tongue around the ring of his hole, basking in the manly musk that swamped my face. “I suppose I can’t hypnotize you down there.” That was debatable. I pushed my tongue through the ring, and it held tight to me. Hell. Was there any part of him that wasn’t strong as iron? I breathed through my nose, taking in the delicious, masculine body that crushed me. I moaned, drawing my tongue out and lapping at his ass. “Unh. UNNH! OH, FUCK! Fuh-uh-uck! Wh–what have I created?” We had no idea…did we? — The next day, sliding into bed, I figured I’d finally make it above the waist. Not without a bit of a fight though. One more time, I froze, pushing my face into his jock, his warm cock grazing my face through the fabric. He had to know. He had to know that my mouth was an empty home, ready for his cock to move in. He had to know that I existed for him to live inside me. He had to know that I’d do anything for him, do anything to be his. Godric gripped me by the back of the head, pulling my face up past his jock and into his abdominals. I nibbled on them, licking at the sweat there, occasionally getting a read on his facial expression. It hardly changed. After a bit, I journeyed back down. His midsection had a kind of gravity. I nibbled his jockstrap. “No,” Godric said, chuckling.”No sucking my cock. Why is that so hard to get through your head?” I kissed his jock and earned another hard slap across the face. “It’s like you don’t even mind getting hit,” Godric said. I raised an eyebrow, licking my lips. “You could hit me as much as you wanted, if you let me suck your cock. I wouldn’t even fight it.” “It seems like you wouldn’t fight it either way.” “You are right, Godric,” I say.”I won’t fight you. I just want to serve you. Did you like how it felt, when I worshipped your ass? How do you think my gay boi mouth would feel–on your big fat donkey cock?” Godric snarled. “Shut up,” he said, “and get back to my abs.” He tightened his grip on the back of my head, pulling me upwards again. The next time I drifted downward, he sighed, dropping the marble and chain in front of my eyes. “Godric…” I whispered. “You still need a little push, Jayden. There’s still a little bit of fire inside you I need to tame. You’ll need one more push to give all your will to me. A push past Blackberry Creek… And into the ocean.” “Godric…” “Do it, Jayden… OPEN YOURSELF.” — My pride necklace felt lighter as I took it off on the sixth day. Godric looked to be almost done with his book. “May I?” I asked. Godric nodded, and I crawled into bed. I approached from the side today, to avoid the temptation of gluing my face to his jock. Instead, I buried my face between his pectorals, pausing, looking into his eyes. “What are you waiting for?” Godric asked. I licked my lips, opened my mouth, and dragged it around his skin. Then I formed a vacuum, drawing the sweat from him. Godric ran his hand through my hair. His pectorals inflated as I slid along them. When I hooked my tongue on his nipple, light slashed through his eyes, he gasped for breath, and he clutched my hair tight. I nibbled his nipple, groaning, and our eyes locked. “You like sucking on my nipple, gay boi?” “Mmnh.” I journeyed along, pressing my lips into his shoulder, and then his arm. He flexed for me, as I dropped little rings of moisture on his muscles. I kissed under his arm and then–when I reached his armpit–closed my eyes and took a slow sniff. “Is that what you want?” Godric asked. “I feel safe like this,” I said. Godric massaged the back of my neck and I closed my eyes. He moved his arm down, draping it over my back, and we softened together, me falling into a haze in his clutches. “Go ahead, gay boi,” Godric breathed in my ear, “RELAX.” He gripped my ass till the tension weakened. “It’s yours,” I whispered. “My body. My mind. Anything you want.” “I know, Jayden. At some level, I’ve known forever. I just…didn’t quite know what to do with you.” I flexed my ass tenderly into his strong hand, my mind melting away. — On the seventh day, Godric was a bit more lax. “Wanna go to Gay Burger with some of the others?” he asked. Godric seemed to read my frustration at not interacting with the redshirts. Granted, they might just think I was busy for Finals, but there never really had been a reckoning for me snubbing them. Twice. I would fear retribution, except there seemed nothing to fear with Godric by my side. “Okay Godric. Should I text the redshirts?” “I’ll text Kai and Gizmo. Dustin and Colt can sit this one out. They haven’t been good for you.” “Yes sir.” An hour later, we walked inside. The waiters were all dressed as slutty Spandex Santas with little Santa hats. “Hi! I’m Spanda, the Slutty Sexy Spandex Santa Panda!” The waiter said. “Can I take your order?” “Sure,” Godric said. “Can I have the Powertop Works, with a side of the French Kiss Fries. And to drink I’ll have the Fudgepacked Slap.” “Did you want your French Kiss Fries straight or curly-rainbow?” “Straight.” “Oh, I’m sorry, we stopped serving straight when we opened in 2012. But the curly rainbow ones are even better. Everyone says so.” The waiter turned to Gizmo. “And for you, ze?” Gizmo turned the menu page. “Can I have the Santa Baby-back Ribs, with a side of the Worst Brat Bratworst and the Twilight Twinkie Shake?” “All that for a skinny bitch like you?” “I like tempo,” Gizmo said. The waiter nodded knowingly. Then he turned to me. “Can I have the Tenderly Pounded Bottom Burger, with a side of Brown Sausage, and to drink, the My Soda Sodamy.” “Of course. Would you like any flavors in your sodamy. We have cherry, chocolate, or lemon.” “Surprise me,” I said. “That would be best. Sometimes some of that gets in there when we don’t really mean it. And you sir, last but definitely not least?” Kai thumbed his menu. “Can I have the make the Yuletide Verse Gay Burger, with a side of sweet Snow-Globes, and to drink, water.” “…Water. Just…Water?” “Yeah.” “Hey Mona Lisa!” Spanda yelled to someone in the back. “Do we serve water?” “WATER! Just WATER!?” “Yeah?” “They have to call it Water & Sports!” “Okay, FIIIINE!” Kai said. “To drink I’ll have the Water & Sports.” — On the last night, perhaps because Gay Burger took me out of my haze a bit, I had a bit of difficulty taking off my pride. It got stuck around my ears and I had to shake my head like a dog to get it to come off. I bent over, picking it up off the floor, before draping it over the doorknob. Then I made my way inside. The door clicked shut behind me; Godric turned the page of his book. I crawled in from the bottom, kissing his body parts one more time: his foot, his quads, (I had to twist him a bit to peck his ass cheek), his balls (through the strap), his abdominals, and his nipples. What today? I crawled a tad higher, and closed my lips around his chin. “Really. My chin?” Godric said. I raised my eyebrows, moving my lips a bit higher, and puckering out. Godric laughed, pushing my face away. When Godric let go, I tried again, lunging for his lips, but he pinned my face against the pillow. He nibbled my ear softly before whispering, “Very funny.” I twisted out of his grip, making another move. This time, Godric did little to stop me–except barricading his lips from mine with his hand at the last second. Undeterred, I kissed and licked the palm of his hand as though we were really kissing, Godric’s eyes inches from mine. Godric stroked my hair, the fire in his eyes growing. I licked his fingers, before tracing his ear. Then I whispered, “so when you said you would fuck me at the end of the week–did you mean today?” “I said you had to go seven days without putting your hands in the cookie jar,” Godric said, his eyes flickering to his jock.”You know as well as I do I meant seven FULL days.” “Well–if that sentiment evolves over the course of the night–you know I won’t mind.” I placed Godric’s hands on my ass cheeks and sucked softly on his neck. Godric played along, massaging me. My ass cheeks flexed before taking whatever shape Godric molded them into. I moaned into his neck, stealing a glance up at his eyes, pleading. “Soon, gay boy,” Godric said. “But it was supposed to be a reward after finals.” I wrapped my arms around Godric, shivering, trying not to sniff. “What is it?” Godric asked. I buried my face into Godric’s chest, obscuring a tear. “What is it?” Godric asked again, tapping my face. I tore my face away. “Every shard of what’s left of me wants you. And I never thought I could feel such complete, overbearing desire–it hurts, Godric. I want you so badly it hurts. I love you Godric. I’ve loved you ever since the moment I met you. And I built a life around loving you. Around learning how to love you without losing it. Loving you without losing myself. I–I needed Tyrant. To exist. Tyrant–that bossy simpleton–was my crutch for not feeling this vulnerable. Because otherwise, your gravity is so addictive… So dominating… So powerful… It would rip me into little bits. And Tyrant, for all his stupid overbearing clamping down–Tyrant held me together.” “I know, gay boy. You put me in an impossible position. Because how could I help you–if you are your own enemy? If you split yourself up like that, and go to war with yourself, I can only ever be your friend AND your enemy.” “So then don’t be my friend,” I whispered. “Be my Master.” “I never signed up for this kind of responsibility.” “I’ll make it worth your while. I’ll do anything for you, Godric. Anything, anything, I swear.” “If I’m your Tyrant, there will still be a part of you that sees me as an enemy.” “No there won’t,” I say, trying not to cry. “Because the only reason I was at war with myself was because I couldn’t have you. The only reason I miss Tyrant is because he helped me hold back from you, and he helped me fake confidence when I needed to. I can fill that void–fill any void–with you.” Godric sighed, squeezing my ass. Then he swung the marble and chain in front of my eyes. “It will take training. To unlearn that emotional clamping–and learn to let yourself feel everything again.” “I’ll do it,” I said, my eyes following the marble back and forth.”Teach me to feel–as you feel.” Godric stroked my hair, a sadness filling his eyes. “Don’t be a fool, Jayden. You may not need a Tyrant–but one of us does.” “Maybe not–” I said softly. Godric nibbled on my ear. “Take a swim in Blackberry Creek. C’mon. Spread your legs and swim for me…” I spread my legs, shoving my ass up into the air. “Please, Godric. Don’t make me go just yet…Please…” “And what would you have us do, first, Jayden.” My ass bloomed open behind me, I could feel my hole clenching… I reached out behind me, groping at Godric’s jock. I found what I sought and carefully slipped it out the top, holding it tight. It felt almost sacred, holding his big, warm, veiny cock in the palm of my hand. I sensed his heartbeat. I pulled his huge cock in towards my ass, mashing it around near my hole, whimpering, hoping he would understand what I was going for. “Why do you embarrass yourself like this?” “I’m not embarrassed, Godric. This is me.” “And what is that?” “Yours. Yours to do with what you will.” Godric drooped the marble in front of my eyes, like a spider hopping free and hanging by a thread. “Look at the marble Jayden. 1…2…3…4…Heaven knows the Storm in Store.” “Heaven knows the Storm in Store.” “5…6…7…8…Godric’s Clock Rigs Tickled Fate.” “Godric’s Clock Rigs Tickled Fate.” “You are mine now, Jayden. So you better go hard on those Finals. Then, I can go as hard on you as your heart’s desires. Maybe even a little too hard.” “No such thing,” I whispered. But moments later, I was under his spell. And while parts of my body stayed as hard as possible, my mind became softer than a Fudgepack Slap in the sun. Though….that didn’t sound too bad. Melting, melting, melting, like snow into a stream… Where do we go? — —

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